Amoeba Dick passed the 80,000 word mark this afternoon, meaning it's on schedule for completion some time in late March. Next projects:- (1) Hire an agent to secure me a publishing contract for Amoeba Dick. One agent has expressed an interest, but wants to see a complete copy of the work before agreeing to represent me. (2) Upload my PhD thesis. This process is slightly complicated by the fact that my thesis features a lot of symbolic logic, some of the formatting of which tends to get lost when the beast is uploaded onto a new platform. So it'll probably take me several days, after uploading the whole thing, to go through it with a hard copy, inputting all the lost symbols. (3) Start work on my next novel, which will be one of the following two:- (a) a singularly revolting parody of Ulysses called - and I can only apologise for this - "Odour Issues". The less said about this the better, frankly, but I think it will be jolly good. (b) "Pretty Poli; or, Monsieur Perroquet's Ascent to a High Perch"; this being a novel about a very clever parrot which scales the greasy pole of human endeavour, in particular making a career in politics, eventually enjoying a period as Home or Foreign Secretary. Withal, this is a novel of hubris, for alas our feathered friend's downfall is brought about by a character defect peculiar, it may be supposed, to the generality of parrots, viz. a liking for smut.